How often do you evaluate the movies you see? About the movie as a whole, or the plot, the characters, the acting, the graphics, the music? On these topics I imagine we analyze them both conciously and subconciously throughout the experience as well as right afterwards. We talk of how the parts came together to create the whole, about the merits of this actor/actress, how they brought out their character. How the movie was too slow in this part or how everything blended together perfectly. Perhaps we discuss the pros and cons of sequels, either to eagerly anticipate the next installment or shake our heads and wonder why they're wasting their money when they should have spent it making this one better first.
Though I've never studied film-making, acting, or any such portion of the movie industry, I invite myself in as a movie lover. Without those such as myself there would be no blockbusters, no midnight releases, no box office top ten lists. There would be no thought of a sequel, for who would have gone to see the first? I've never spent time and money listening to critics and professionals tell me how to appreciate their version of a "good movie" or cast disdain on their version of a "bad movie" simply because I don't care to let others decide what makes me happy. What has never occured to me before this, however, is why they make me happy.
Our family owns hundreds of movies. Literally. VHS, DVD, BluRay, Digital. I myself own 40 or 50 (pithy in comparison, I know, but as I still live more or less at home, why bother spending my money on those I know my family will buy?). My favorite movies include Star Trek, The Little Mermaid, Cinderella Man, and The Lord of the Rings to name just a few. I think the ones I love most draw on some aspect of my passion, my romanticism, my perception of my identity, to allow me to be drawn in, to relate to the characters and story and appreciate the work that went into them. Does this make them "good"? Perhaps, perhaps not. Who am I to decide for anyone but myself?
Tonight I saw a movie that truly blew all other movies I've seen this year completely out of the water. And lets face it, there have been quite a few incredible movies this year: Julie and Julia, Up, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Star Trek (I've watched my copy alone over 10 times), Avatar, Sherlock Holmes, Terminator Salvation, and Transformers 2 just to name a very few. I appreciated many of these for their plots, their music, their casts, their special effects, their expansion of their genres. So what is it about this movie that rises above all these others? Simple. It not only drew me into the story, the lives of those portrayed (brilliantly, it must be said), but gave me much in return. What is the movie I've taken four paragraphs to get to? Invictus.
It's not often that I walk out of a movie theater feeling truly better than when I entered. It's even more rare when I walk out with more self-esteem. I don't know the last time, if ever, that I walked out of a movie with a positive sense of purpose to truly improve, progress, challenge myself to raise the bar because the standards I only subconciously set for myself are proven to be lower than what I know I can truly attain in this my life.
If you want special effects, go see Avatar, you won't be disappointed. If you want a good, solid, fast-paced sci-fi, by all means watch Star Trek. If you want a wonderfully diverse family-friendly flick, I highly recommend The Princess and the Frog. If you want to learn more of the world, see Invictus. If you want to learn more of how public opinion shapes politics, and how politicians can shape public perception see Invictus. If you want to see Morgan Freeman in a role that truly brings out his genius, see Invictus. Perhaps most of all, though, if you want to learn more about yourself, about what draws on your heart and intellect both, about the effect that one person can have on the lives of many others no matter who they are, please, see Invictus. While I can't speak for anyone else, I will tell you this: I walked into that theater alone and a bit lonely, and walked out feeling loved.
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Saturday, December 26, 2009
December-Out like a...frisky puppy!
Well, maybe not a frisky puppy, but not really a lamb either :) The annual Petty Christmas Party was held in Draper on Sunday and was fun. We talked, we ate, and we did a gift exchange. Fortunately Santa Claus had other engagements and didn't make an appearance this year (which was fine with all of us, as the 5 great-grandchildren in attendance were too young and the rest of us too old).
I actually took a Christmas vacation this year-three days, mostly to myself or with family (as Christmas vacations should be spent). On Wednesday I slept in a bit, went to physical therapy, and spent the rest of the day doing laundry, some cleaning, and other odds and ends that I can't really remember but I'm sure I enjoyed. Christmas Eve found me sleeping in again (yay sleep!) and then going downtown with Mom, Michael, Jane and Morgan to DG, where some of us played, and one of us did all of her Christmas shopping (it was pay day, and fortunately only took me an hour) and working (a few things cropped up while I was there). Lisa and Dalton came up too and we all went to lunch together, after which I made another stop back at work before going home, where I spent some time watching White Christmas and wrapping presents.
That night was the Phillips Christmas Party, this time hosted at our house. We ate, watched the three dogs tumble and play, and watched the younger kids open presents from Grandma and Grandpa Phillips. Afterwards those who were spending the night got on our new pajamas courtesy the Pajama Fairy (thanks Mom!). Laura and Chris then joined me in my appartment where they watched White Christmas and wrapped their family's presents while I did my physical therapy exercises, which got rid of a headache I'd been fighting all day. Most of the family started watching our annual movie It's a Wonderful Life, though Chris, Laura and I stayed in my place to finish watching White Christmas (it was a White Christmas marathon on AMC, if you were wondering :)). I fell asleep pretty quickly that night, even before they were done playing Santa Claus--there were three or four people right outside my open bedroom door.
We all got up at about 7:00 Christmas morning, where we opened the presents we had received, and then watched Jane open her presents. It took a while, as she totally loved the second or third present--a set of toy dishes. She wasn't at all interested in opening any more until she was told she could play with the dishes afterward. We also called a few people and caroled-Chase (Amy's fiance), Lisa (the only one who answered), and Michael (Chris's brother, who didn't answer and had no idea who was calling :)). Mom made a delicious breakfast, after which I took a short nap and then went to the movies with Amy, Laura and Chris. We saw Sherlock Holmes-what a great movie!!-and then returned home where Laura was a mom again and I spent most of the rest of the day watching Star Trek Voyager (finally on Season 7, yay!) on a new LCD TV. Cool, eh? Ok so it's a 15" LCD, but still and LCD :)
I went to work this morning planning on it being busy but expecting it to be just a regular Saturday for the most part. Fortunately for me (though unfortunately for the museum) it was much like a normal Saturday, though we had a few busy waves come through. I took advantage of our increased staff discount to purchase a Perplexus, a 3D maze game that we got in earlier this week and have already sold most of them. I also brought home some Kapla blocks- a set of blocks that are all equal in size. While it might sound boring, they're actually a lot of fun. You can build almost anything you put your mind to.
Overall I've quite thoroughly enjoyed this Christmas season. I'm looking forward to much book shopping in the near future (I got a total $75 in gift cards to Barnes and Noble) and using my new knives and my other presents. Merry Christmas!
I actually took a Christmas vacation this year-three days, mostly to myself or with family (as Christmas vacations should be spent). On Wednesday I slept in a bit, went to physical therapy, and spent the rest of the day doing laundry, some cleaning, and other odds and ends that I can't really remember but I'm sure I enjoyed. Christmas Eve found me sleeping in again (yay sleep!) and then going downtown with Mom, Michael, Jane and Morgan to DG, where some of us played, and one of us did all of her Christmas shopping (it was pay day, and fortunately only took me an hour) and working (a few things cropped up while I was there). Lisa and Dalton came up too and we all went to lunch together, after which I made another stop back at work before going home, where I spent some time watching White Christmas and wrapping presents.
That night was the Phillips Christmas Party, this time hosted at our house. We ate, watched the three dogs tumble and play, and watched the younger kids open presents from Grandma and Grandpa Phillips. Afterwards those who were spending the night got on our new pajamas courtesy the Pajama Fairy (thanks Mom!). Laura and Chris then joined me in my appartment where they watched White Christmas and wrapped their family's presents while I did my physical therapy exercises, which got rid of a headache I'd been fighting all day. Most of the family started watching our annual movie It's a Wonderful Life, though Chris, Laura and I stayed in my place to finish watching White Christmas (it was a White Christmas marathon on AMC, if you were wondering :)). I fell asleep pretty quickly that night, even before they were done playing Santa Claus--there were three or four people right outside my open bedroom door.
We all got up at about 7:00 Christmas morning, where we opened the presents we had received, and then watched Jane open her presents. It took a while, as she totally loved the second or third present--a set of toy dishes. She wasn't at all interested in opening any more until she was told she could play with the dishes afterward. We also called a few people and caroled-Chase (Amy's fiance), Lisa (the only one who answered), and Michael (Chris's brother, who didn't answer and had no idea who was calling :)). Mom made a delicious breakfast, after which I took a short nap and then went to the movies with Amy, Laura and Chris. We saw Sherlock Holmes-what a great movie!!-and then returned home where Laura was a mom again and I spent most of the rest of the day watching Star Trek Voyager (finally on Season 7, yay!) on a new LCD TV. Cool, eh? Ok so it's a 15" LCD, but still and LCD :)
I went to work this morning planning on it being busy but expecting it to be just a regular Saturday for the most part. Fortunately for me (though unfortunately for the museum) it was much like a normal Saturday, though we had a few busy waves come through. I took advantage of our increased staff discount to purchase a Perplexus, a 3D maze game that we got in earlier this week and have already sold most of them. I also brought home some Kapla blocks- a set of blocks that are all equal in size. While it might sound boring, they're actually a lot of fun. You can build almost anything you put your mind to.
Overall I've quite thoroughly enjoyed this Christmas season. I'm looking forward to much book shopping in the near future (I got a total $75 in gift cards to Barnes and Noble) and using my new knives and my other presents. Merry Christmas!
December-In like a Lion...
This month has been one for the books. A lot of ups and downs, ins and outs. Fortunately, I'm on an upswing. Thank you Christmas!
As I mentioned before, I saw a neurologist about my migraines. He prescribed the physical therapy (which has already made a big difference!), a new 'when-I-get-a-migraine' medicine (still haven't filled that one...anyone have $100 lying around?), a preventative called Zonisamide, and no more caffeine. I quit caffeine that day and got the Zonisamide. Everything went quite well for the first few days (caffeine withdrawal headaches aside)-I didn't get a migraine, I was getting plenty of sleep, my attitude perked up and I was pretty happy for the most part. Unfortunately, I did a complete 180 after only five or so days on the medicine, and completely bottomed out about 3 days later. Literaly. It was honestly the scariest thing I can ever remember going through.
I normally am able to focus on what's going on, and catch myself (at least to some degree) when I'm feeling down and can then work through whatever trial is at hand, be it a new manifestation of an old concern or a new one all-together. My dad has definitely helped in this process over the last several years (thanks Dad!). I started noticing though that I was sinking fast. I started getting down on a Sunday. Monday and Tuesday were progressively harder to work through, and I began to get an idea that something was wrong, but I didn't take the time to really sit and figure it out.
I started my physical therapy early on Wednesday morning and went straight to work, where I knew after only an hour or so that something was seriously wrong. I was fine when it was just me, but after we had been open only an hour or so I couldn't stay still. Everygthing was getting on my nerves, and I was jittery. It reached a point where I could not focus-my first desire was to start running. Somewhere, anywhere, as long as I possibly could and longer. Knowing I couldn't do that, I took a 15 minute break (I NEVER take 15's) and walked briskly around the Gateway Mall on a day where the temperature didn't even get to 30. My face was numb by the end, but I had expended some of my energy and finally was able to focus to some small degree on getting online orders out (our online store, almost discontinued, blew last year's numbers out of the water and will now live on (YAY!)). Another indication that something was totally wrong came in that I could not tolerate what I perceived as lazy behavior in my coworkers. While I normally make myself look at a situation more objectively, I had to force myself to not blow the situation out of the water completely. As it was I did later apologize to one coworker who got the short end of my temper (though it was much tempered, it was rather extreme of me).
I made it through the workday only by sheer force of will and the help of the Spirit, for I did not do it alone. My coworkers caught on after a bit that something was NOT right (thanks Megan and Joe especially!) and the day eventually came to a close--but not until about 7:30 or 8:00 as I did the night's reports on my own and then remembered that another register had to be set up for the next day. I had come to suspect early in the day that the Zonisamide was playing a part, and I definitely received a confirmation of that after getting home and taking another dose. Oh dear.
I swung quickly from extreme frustration to anxiety attacks (which I've never had before that night) to sobbing uncontrollably, all within minutes or even seconds of each other. The only times I felt any peace at all that night were in a short but definitely earnest prayer and later when I received a Father's Blessing, without which I would have gone to the hospital. Fortunately I had the next day off. I slept in, and then (foolishly) drove to my neurologist's office. I was feeling more or less ok that morning, but shortely after arriving everything came back almost full-swing. I think I scared the receptionist (which was kind of funny in hind-sight, but not then) and barely lasted the 10 or 15 minute wait for the doctor's response, which was to stop taking the medicine (well duh!) and come back in a week. Arg. I spent the rest of the day napping on the couch and watching Star Trek (Chris Pine does an amazing job, and Zachary Quinto's right up there with him).
The next six days were bumpy at best with frequent anxiety issues, though each day got a little better. One friend finally explained what was going on-Organic Depression triggered by the Zonisamide. It was a small relief just to have an idea, a name to go with the roller-coaster ride. I finally saw the neurologist again a week after my trip to his office. After apologizing to the receptionist, that is ;). I was told to list Zonisamide as an allergy in the future and given a new preventative--one that I've been on before and didn't react to negatively. I also learned that the medicine was completely out of my system 3 days after I stopped taking it, though I personally was still trying to recover. No more anxiety, finally able to concentrate, no more tip-toeing around words at work (well, no more than usual, anyways) the next day. Ah, relief.
I think I'll end this one here and start another for Christmas. Bravo to those who read this whole thing :)
As I mentioned before, I saw a neurologist about my migraines. He prescribed the physical therapy (which has already made a big difference!), a new 'when-I-get-a-migraine' medicine (still haven't filled that one...anyone have $100 lying around?), a preventative called Zonisamide, and no more caffeine. I quit caffeine that day and got the Zonisamide. Everything went quite well for the first few days (caffeine withdrawal headaches aside)-I didn't get a migraine, I was getting plenty of sleep, my attitude perked up and I was pretty happy for the most part. Unfortunately, I did a complete 180 after only five or so days on the medicine, and completely bottomed out about 3 days later. Literaly. It was honestly the scariest thing I can ever remember going through.
I normally am able to focus on what's going on, and catch myself (at least to some degree) when I'm feeling down and can then work through whatever trial is at hand, be it a new manifestation of an old concern or a new one all-together. My dad has definitely helped in this process over the last several years (thanks Dad!). I started noticing though that I was sinking fast. I started getting down on a Sunday. Monday and Tuesday were progressively harder to work through, and I began to get an idea that something was wrong, but I didn't take the time to really sit and figure it out.
I started my physical therapy early on Wednesday morning and went straight to work, where I knew after only an hour or so that something was seriously wrong. I was fine when it was just me, but after we had been open only an hour or so I couldn't stay still. Everygthing was getting on my nerves, and I was jittery. It reached a point where I could not focus-my first desire was to start running. Somewhere, anywhere, as long as I possibly could and longer. Knowing I couldn't do that, I took a 15 minute break (I NEVER take 15's) and walked briskly around the Gateway Mall on a day where the temperature didn't even get to 30. My face was numb by the end, but I had expended some of my energy and finally was able to focus to some small degree on getting online orders out (our online store, almost discontinued, blew last year's numbers out of the water and will now live on (YAY!)). Another indication that something was totally wrong came in that I could not tolerate what I perceived as lazy behavior in my coworkers. While I normally make myself look at a situation more objectively, I had to force myself to not blow the situation out of the water completely. As it was I did later apologize to one coworker who got the short end of my temper (though it was much tempered, it was rather extreme of me).
I made it through the workday only by sheer force of will and the help of the Spirit, for I did not do it alone. My coworkers caught on after a bit that something was NOT right (thanks Megan and Joe especially!) and the day eventually came to a close--but not until about 7:30 or 8:00 as I did the night's reports on my own and then remembered that another register had to be set up for the next day. I had come to suspect early in the day that the Zonisamide was playing a part, and I definitely received a confirmation of that after getting home and taking another dose. Oh dear.
I swung quickly from extreme frustration to anxiety attacks (which I've never had before that night) to sobbing uncontrollably, all within minutes or even seconds of each other. The only times I felt any peace at all that night were in a short but definitely earnest prayer and later when I received a Father's Blessing, without which I would have gone to the hospital. Fortunately I had the next day off. I slept in, and then (foolishly) drove to my neurologist's office. I was feeling more or less ok that morning, but shortely after arriving everything came back almost full-swing. I think I scared the receptionist (which was kind of funny in hind-sight, but not then) and barely lasted the 10 or 15 minute wait for the doctor's response, which was to stop taking the medicine (well duh!) and come back in a week. Arg. I spent the rest of the day napping on the couch and watching Star Trek (Chris Pine does an amazing job, and Zachary Quinto's right up there with him).
The next six days were bumpy at best with frequent anxiety issues, though each day got a little better. One friend finally explained what was going on-Organic Depression triggered by the Zonisamide. It was a small relief just to have an idea, a name to go with the roller-coaster ride. I finally saw the neurologist again a week after my trip to his office. After apologizing to the receptionist, that is ;). I was told to list Zonisamide as an allergy in the future and given a new preventative--one that I've been on before and didn't react to negatively. I also learned that the medicine was completely out of my system 3 days after I stopped taking it, though I personally was still trying to recover. No more anxiety, finally able to concentrate, no more tip-toeing around words at work (well, no more than usual, anyways) the next day. Ah, relief.
I think I'll end this one here and start another for Christmas. Bravo to those who read this whole thing :)
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
And the plot thickens...
I saw a neurologist today. The first time in my life I've seen one, which is kindof odd I suppose when for over a decade I've been getting different treatments for migraines. I was actually rather impressed. Dr. Evan Black took detailed notes and also answered my questions without being at all condescending, something he shares with my cardiologist and my primary care physician. I've totally lucked out. I did get the impression though that it's a bit of a sore spot between neurology and cardiology on whether or not PFO closures help migraines.
He told me to quite caffeine and gave me three prescriptions, one for when I get migraines (the copay alone on that one is $95, I'm holding off for now...), one for a preventative-four pills a night of a med usually used for seizures, and one for (drum roll please) physical therapy. That's a first. I've had variations of the first, I've tried a preventative with mixed results, but never have I been refered for physical therapy. I'm certainly hopeful, many of my migraines start because of the tension in my neck. The only downside to it, at the moment, is that my first apointment at TOSH is Monday...morning...at 6:30 AM. Oh joy ;)
I am always curious though about the range of medications I've been prescribed in the past. My first preventative was an anti-depressant. One doctor tried giving me regular migraine meds, followed by a heart medicine, then a different prescription for seizures. Guess we'll see how this latest combination works out :)
He told me to quite caffeine and gave me three prescriptions, one for when I get migraines (the copay alone on that one is $95, I'm holding off for now...), one for a preventative-four pills a night of a med usually used for seizures, and one for (drum roll please) physical therapy. That's a first. I've had variations of the first, I've tried a preventative with mixed results, but never have I been refered for physical therapy. I'm certainly hopeful, many of my migraines start because of the tension in my neck. The only downside to it, at the moment, is that my first apointment at TOSH is Monday...morning...at 6:30 AM. Oh joy ;)
I am always curious though about the range of medications I've been prescribed in the past. My first preventative was an anti-depressant. One doctor tried giving me regular migraine meds, followed by a heart medicine, then a different prescription for seizures. Guess we'll see how this latest combination works out :)
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